NEW YOU, WHO DIS?
Our brains are INCREDIBLE.
They can work with us, for us, or against us. Our brain is the storage facility for our bodies and experiences and until we respect it and give it the space it needs, we are looking at employee disengagement. Our bodies are still used to storing up energy and anxiety from primitive days. This feature used to regularly save us from getting eaten by tigers. Now the closest you're going to get to that is a barista chasing you down 7th because you forgot your chase card in the pay thingie. Also, yeah right, in New York City a requirement of a barista is to be supes chill.
So what do we do when our bodies are manifesting this stress and sending the message to our brain that we must act!? Most of us, sit with this primitive energy wondering what the F is wrong with us. Most of us get into a chat room about anxiety to try to understand what this fight or flight instinct is but then we just get more anxious and it ruins our day. Or something. What happens to that energy when we feel, judge, and ignore?
We let our imagination eat it, and we feel nuts.
If you are anything like me - perfectionist, creative, cerebral, constantly curious - you decide to let your imagination hurt you instead of help you, most of the time. I will imagine a negative scenario just to see how I would respond to - survival instinct gone wild, right? And because I get a dopamine hit from feeling that anxiety, I have now trained my brain to respond to imaginary circumstances in a stressful way.
Oh, did I mention I've been a trained actor since I was 6?
Yikes. My fiance is in heaven.
When I get the small hit of "I deserve this" my body and brain become furiously busy. I mean, hey, 6,000 years ago this wild imagination would have been very helpful. CUT TO: Me standing in a field alerting the villagers that the tiger is 5 clicks north. Oh, word?
Now, this ancient response keeps me from doing my best work, from being present with the people around me, and keeps me in a dizzying negative cycle.
But guess what... it's physical, not emotional. The memories that come up for you when you feel this stress - are just decoration. You don't have anything else to solve about that memory, there is nothing for you to do. This worry habit is simply a physical issue. So let's break it.
Your brain will remember the pain you want it to, and since you’re so obsessed and need to think about that thing you said to that teacher in 3rd grade that made your mom mad and crushed your spirit, your brain says "Oh ok you need to feel that same thing every time you feel stressed, here is a short cut just for you". She thinks you need help getting to that feeling again because for all she knows - you need it for survival.
Your wonderfully complex brain literally creates a shortcut for you so you can get the pain response, the hit, you need - to run from the tiger.
You're the Tiger, boo.
And that's incredible news, because now we can be peaceful right!?
Yes, absolutely, but give it time.
Next time you feel that Tiger running up to getcha, I want you to take a deep breath and look around you. Ask these things:
1) Am I in danger?
2) Did something horrible just happen?
And once you answer those two questions with a laughable "nope", I want you to notice everything around you and say it out loud. For example:
"The man in the green coat is walking his dog".
"The bird dove into the water and scooped up a fish".
Then take the observation inside, but still out loud:
"My feet are firmly planted on the ground. I am slouching a bit to my left. I am taking a deep breath".
Continue this until your brain writes into its moleskin notebook that there is nothing to fear, no need for a hit, and the tiger is sleeping.